I repeat myself, but what two consenting and willing adults do in the privacy of their bedroom is no one's business but their own assuming no one will be permanently damaged by what passes between them.
No one asks to be raped.
And it requires you to be fully conscious and able to say NO if you don't want sex. If you are drunk or drugged with date rape drugs, then it is still rape even though it may be without signs of struggle.
I've heard women say they've heard women say they accused men of rape when the man hadn't raped them at all. But I don't know why any woman would put themselves through such an ordeal for the sake of hurting a man.
First the woman must subject herself to getting a rape kit done, DNA samples are taken from either the anus or vagina or where ever the man penetrated with witnesses to make sure you aren't making it up, photos are taken, and then it comes to he said, she said. Her sex history is taken into account, if they'd previously been lovers... she is put on trial first before the man and then what if you were raped and he gets away with it, because after all trials are pretty much coin flips, especially cases for rape and with most women siding with the rapist, the woman has a better than average chance of losing and in some cases may even face charges herself for falsely accusing someone of rape. In my opinion, I doubt there are any false rape claims or more like 1 in a million... The disadvantages of falsely accusing rape far out-weigh the benefits. And even if the rapist is successfully convicted the penalty may be appallingly light. In the case of this 14 year old girl, the judge gave the 49 year old guy 31 days. 31 days!
What I think is abundantly more likely is most rapes go unreported.
But I suspect men want to focus on the false accusations of rape to make all rape disappear. Apart of this is the increasing desire to decriminalize rape in an effort to make abortion illegal but mainly it is to exert control over women. I used to (jokingly) say decriminalizing rape is the only way GOP men can insure that they can get 'some'. Perhaps joking about the size of mens penises is a better way to go when it comes to rape since women who claim to be raped are met with disbelief by the police when they report the crime.
A better society will be where men keep men in check and not allow men to rape other people, men, women or children, and no one blames the victim, only the perpetrator. What we have to remember rape has nothing to do with sex but everything to do with control and power.
Similarly I have no issue with women working as prostitutes and if a woman chooses to work as a prostitute she should be safe and treated with as much respect as any other worker.
Women need money to live in our society too. I never understood slut shaming as anything other than male jealousy that women can get as much sex as they like and men have to 'beg' for it. It's not right women have any power over men at all?
Slut shaming is a hangover from the days when men owned their wives and children and so when he was supporting them he wanted to make sure the children were his. Also marrying a virgin was to protect a man from being compared to other lovers and so if the woman never achieved satisfaction that was irrelevant.
As I said what is acceptable in the bedroom should be up to the couple involved. What might titillate one night may be boring the next. Some couples may enjoy some kinds of play and others different kinds of play. But for gods sake, don't do something that you don't want to do or will hurt you, just because he asked you to.
I understand romantic notion of the total submission to the person you love and desiring to please them. However I don't understand the one way dynamic of only being able to deal with a fourteen year old partner, where the man knows necessarily what is best for their partner in all situations as in these domestic discipline relationships. Don't let him hit you unless that is what you want to do and you enjoy it.
By all means experiment, if it doesn't work for you stop. But don't then turn around and tell other women they should be hit by their husbands and be totally submissive. Do whatever works for you. It may be that the man wants to be submissive. I don't think there is anything wrong with that either. Whatever works for you and your partner is fine so long as everyone has their eyes open, is adult and wants the situation.