Marie PhD
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Victim Blaming

11/8/2013

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Picture
A guy walks into a clothes shop and tries on a suit that he'd seen someone else try on. He then walks out of the store with the new suit on.

The owner calls the police and charges the guy with shoplifting. They go to court and the guy argues: Someone else tried on the suit before, it was asking to be shoplifted and finally, you let me try it on in the store...

No one would accept these ludicrous arguments as an excuse for shoplifting but all these arguments seem to work in rape cases.

If she's not a virgin, her experience has left her a wanton nymphomaniac. We all know that's not true. Most of the time women aren't thinking of sex, they're thinking of what they'll cook for dinner and whether they left the fridge door open. They aren't asking for it.

Similarly, women can be wearing anything and men will ask them for sex. Seriously, friends of mine have told me they'd be walking home from work in their McDonalds uniforms and get propositioned for sex. These are women who are tired from working all day and just want to shower.

If a girl has said yes before or lets you go so far, it doesn't give you permission to necessarily go all the way.

If she's drunk or otherwise drugged it also doesn't give you permission to use her for anything either. She is not to blame, it is the rapist who is to blame. Men or children would never be accused of 'asking' for it if they were raped.

As I have previously written, in ancient Rome, they considered it abhorrent that men couldn't control themselves. They wanted to distinguish themselves from animals and rape carried the death penalty. Perhaps this is why their empire flourished, because men had to control themselves.

Most men know rape is unacceptable. Most men respect women and themselves enough not force themselves upon women. If you find yourself saying she was asking for it, consider whether you might actually be a rapist yourself.

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West v Rest

11/7/2013

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The world is a messed up place but it's clear to me that its better living in the west than most of the rest of the world. And the biggest difference is based on how we treat women. Women are treated better in western countries. They can own property, they can earn money, they don't require a man to be able to do everything. Tools have been developed to overcome women not being as strong as men. Women have access to as much education as men, women aren't necessarily excluded from certain parts of the work force. Women can have bank accounts, own property, drive and own cars..., in their own right, control their bodies and their future. Women can, and probably most importantly, chose which partner they'll have and can divorce and still have their kids and property.

That's in the west.

As women's rights have gained ground over the past 200-400 years government has improved too. Have you ever noticed that the US also treats other countries where women are treated well, better than they treat countries where women aren't treated well?

The more powerful the women are, or how much money they have in that country seems to have direct baring on how good the economy is in the country. As micro-lending has extended into third world countries, those countries economies have improved and become economic players, such as India. (Micro loans go to women in third world countries because they found when giving the loans to men, the men spent the money on rubbish to impress each other, whereas women prioritized the spending on the family and business).

In biology it has been proved that a society/species will evolve faster according to the traits the female selects for, even if it increases the likelihood of the demise of the species. For instance, the Irish deer, female Irish deer picked male deer to breed with who had the biggest antlers. In the end the species breed itself into extinction because the antlers were so huge the male couldn't lift his head. Pretty tragic right? Another example is the peacock, those huge tails the male displays to attract females make it difficult for the bird to escape predators. But the boys proudly display their tails nevertheless so they get the chance to pass their genes on.

So what impact does this have on human society? Quite simply, men will chase what women want and if getting access to women means earning lots of money, then getting money no matter how bad it is for the long term survival of the species will be an extremely desirable trait in the male. And I think we are seeing the effects of women selecting for earning capacity in our society. The environment, the treatment of others, whether its in our own country or in any other country becomes irrelevant, men will chase money because women want rich men. And why do women want rich men? Because we've set up society so that it makes it difficult for women to get access to money themselves. Yes women can have money, property etc, but its harder for women to get it for themselves.

When women have more money, they can chose partners with more desirable traits like kindness, rather than violence. When ancient Rome banned rape and made it a capital offence, Rome went from a monarchy to a republic and the empire  lasted for 500 years. Rome didn't fail until Constantine adopted Christianity after which it was said instead Lucretia suicided because she enjoyed being raped (!)

What seems to me salient, was in Ancient Rome, before christianity, men had to control themselves and act like civilized human beings. We must beware that the behaviour men starts slipping, and it is with men in America making nonsense statements about rape and pregnancy; and women actively shaming women and trying to take women's rights from them.

The treatment of women by a society is paramount to how good that society is. The more rights a woman has, the better that society will be.

If things are getting worse in the US, I think its because people are trying to take women's rights from them. The right of women to control their lives and bodies, the right a woman has to prosecute being raped instead of automatically being blamed because she's the victim; the right to equal pay for equal work and safe in their homes from violence are key aspects of a society. If you want to fix the FED, you should put women in-charge of it and if you want to stimulate the economy you should have given women the money.

Before you go accusing me of saying men should lose all their power to women, I don't think its a zero-sum game. If women are more powerful, society is better for everyone, not just women. If you think women should be powerless, then try living in Afghanistan or the Congo... I don't know of any woman who wants to be better than men, we just want to be equal. Seriously guys, please don't be so afraid of women, we do like you.

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    I am interested in progressive politics, women's rights, science & art. I believe the only way we'll survive is if we help each other.

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