On one of the groups I belong to on facebook someone posted the question, 'Why are people jerks to each other?'
I replied 'i wish i knew' but I lied, I know why.
We need each other. But needing someone makes us vulnerable and we hate to be vulnerable. So we pretend we don't care. Its a show of strength. Of course that's the explanation I wish was true because most of the time we don't see other people as human at all.
Last night I was scrolling through my facebook 'home' page and some group I belong to, although I suspect I have been thrown out, posted a photo of this woman who'd had botox done to her lips, and this group of women were making jokes about her. Seriously, I am sick to death of people laughing about other people who are doing nothing to hurt anyone but themselves. I called them on it and one retorted, we're only having fun. That is fun? People having fun because people are made to feel constantly inadequate so they are driven to do painful things to themselves? It reminded me of this story. Fortunately the woman is well adjusted enough to cope with being the butt of so many jokes. But what if it happens to a vulnerable teen? Or adult? For some reason we associate bullying only with kids and teens, but society finds it acceptable to bully adults too, including and especially women. Women make easy targets, because people seldom go to their defence and often other women join in on the fun.
To the woman who retorted we were only having fun, I said she was an ugly person.
Do not have fun at other people's expense, it is cruel and says more about you as a human being than the person you are making fun of. People who are not hurting anyone, people who obviously have self worth issues, people who cannot defend themselves, why do people attack them? It is cruel.
No I have no issue with people having fun with each other although what we think is gentle ribbing other people may see has hurtful of their feelings. And sometimes people are too sensitive.
Why not attack GOP politicians who think they need to control women instead, or the heir to the Du Pont who rapes his little three year old daughter and gets out of jail time because he supposedly won't do well in jail. These are people who desperately need to be taken down a notch or two.
All I can say is be kind as much as possible. Aim your laughter at the people who deserve it. Not those who are hurting no one but themselves.
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