Marie PhD
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Masculinity

8/17/2019

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There are many articles in conservative mainstream media on the death of masculinity. That, basically, any progress for women only comes at the expense of men, that women are destroying men... and on and on it goes. Consider the assumptions in this... that women prefer girl students, that women aren't wearing burqas so they deserve to be raped on college campuses... (because men can't control themselves - when we know men can control themselves, why aren't men bitterly offended by this assumption? - and if men can't control themselves then perhaps they should go live somewhere else?) But people who think feminism is bad for men, ignore how bad the status quo is for men, for instance the high suicide rate for men, men raping men, men killing men, men being much more likely to experience violence at the hands of men than women do. Basically, in this system, men have a serious man problem.

We, men and women, go together into the future. But as things stand if things aren't working for women and we know things aren't working for men, then perhaps we need to figure out what is going on for both genders.

My take on disappearing masculinity is that of the bully, the man who feels entitled to sex and doesn't think that's rape. As many people have pointed out that this kind of masculinity is really toxic. And that it's as bad for the man as it is for those around them.

However there are things that will never die, like bravery. The bravery of protecting those who have less power than them, those who stand up for others, who risk their lives for others. I would like to think this kind of bravery isn't restricted to men alone. But they do get most of the credit for it. And many of us wouldn't be here if it wasn't for this bravery.

It should go without saying every time a woman gets pregnant she is risking her life for another. That history is full of women who have died in childbirth and so we should remember that many of us wouldn't be here if it wasn't for this bravery and after all, the woman often didn't get a choice in getting pregnant, yet she risks her life anyway. While often men's bravery is always a choice.

Society no longer works for women because women don't (as often) die in childbirth. Women have to have things to do because there is no longer a need for women to reproduce like the human race is about to go extinct. Pandemics which wiped out huge portions of the population are a thing of the past, and husbands leave, die, and sometimes can no longer support the family because of health or accident or whatever reason and the women have to support the family instead. Besides the woman may have had kids because her husband wanted children and he wants to stay at home and look after them. Why shouldn't women get the recognition they deserve both in terms of money and promotions?

But it's my experience that the toxic masculinity of Trump and other conservative men is coming to an end. It seems like their bullying and their entitlement will no longer be tolerated by either gender. That their entitlement is toxic for everyone, the environment and our future.

We go together into the future.


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    I am interested in progressive politics, women's rights, science & art. I believe the only way we'll survive is if we help each other.

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